My forty something friends out there, I have a question for you…
Why do you think you have to navigate your forty something roller coaster (growth opportunity, midlife crisis, life explosion, whatever you want to call it) alone?
There is this huge misconception that because we live in a time where we are surrounded by personal development books, programs, speakers and endless resources that you SHOULD sort this sh*t out by yourself.
People believe that by reading a few books that you suddenly become an expert.
Well, I call bullshit!!
Here’s the thing, do you know what a good behavioural coach actually does?
We expand your unconscious mind, your internal representation of the world, we literally change your reality. We do this through methods, models and strategies that usually you are completely unaware we are using and ultimately take what is unconscious to you and therefore difficult to change and make it conscious.
And this is where the magic happens.
Now if you choose to go through this exceptionally challenging life stage that psychology calls the midlife crisis and I like to call the midlife rebirth relying on just you to navigate it one of two things is going to happen
- 18 months to 2 years later you’ll pop out the other side and reflect back on the carnage but decide that it kinda worked out in the end but you wish it didn’t have to be so painful.
- You stay the same by pushing down your pain and die a little on the inside (this actually happens, it triggers the ageing process) and live out your days reminiscing on what could have been.
Sounds pretty awful to me, which one is you?
There is a third option though and if you are one of the 10% then you grab the bull by the horns, get a good support team around you, that actually knows how to support you through this process and do the work, then you get to completely rediscover who you are and transform your life.
You can not change what you are unconscious to and often what you are conscious of like a dissatisfying relationship or meaningless job becomes the focus of your attention and you think that’s what needs to change.
Maybe but probably not.
This is where going it alone can really blow up in your face and in your need to change you throw mud at a wall to see what sticks.
You think changing your career might work, maybe if you quit your job and start a business you’ll feel better, “and besides isn’t that what everyone on LinkedIn does successfully?” Yes and no, how many people are really successful?
Well, you think, “then it’s my marriage!” Could be, or not…
Did you know that research has shown that as high as 40-55% of people regret their divorce after the dust has settled (Just one article here)? Wow, think of all the damage to you, the kids, your finances, your friendships and you realise it was all a mistake….sh*t!!
And did you know that most people who get divorced and don’t do the work on themselves then attract the same sort of person and find themselves in exactly the same situation with their new partner? The groundhog day of crappy relationships!!
So then “WTF Emma?” I hear you say, “What DO I do?”
You get help, you find a good BEHAVIOURAL coach(like me), you work to expand your conciseness and get into the driver’s seat! You invest in YOURSELF!!
This time in your life is so vital, you can hugely transform so don’t waste the opportunity to become your most exceptional version of yourself like Vera Wang, Stan Lee, Samuel L Jackson and CHARLES DARWIN all found themselves and their success after 40.
Get help from someone who knows the territory, understands what’s getting in your way AND gives you the freedom to be exactly who you are!!!
Come join me on the other side where you no longer give a crap what others think of you, where you are actually succeeding at that meaningful work AND your relationships are connected and loving all because to stopped being who you thought you needed to be and actually began being YOU!!
Big love, Mxx